Winter woes

Standard

 

 

10629813_721018137992012_3845881888355659103_n

 

The past 10 weeks have been the most challenging yet rewarding. I have been training to become a Yoga Instructor and have learned beyond the poses and flow.  I was so nervous for the strenuous aspect of becoming a physical expert, I never expected to learn so much about my true soul and inner being. Yoga has a bad reputation for the difficulty in stretching, awkwardness of silence and skepticism in spiritual practices.  It is the connection of mind, body and soul. The acceptance of yourself and the journey within. The ability to see the beauty and light within yourself and share the wisdom and love outside yourself. You develop a philosophy practice and acquire a healthy mindset.

The transition of Fall to Winter is gradually starting to affect me. I am a fan of warmth and the outdoors. I find value in being able to explore the outdoors and be active. I excel in the heat and am a fire sign, so naturally I am always moving at a high speed. With the cold creeping on me, I’ve approached multiple signs for my inner heat and flame to slowly settle. For the past three years, I have gotten a ticket in November for speeding, entered a relationship I wasn’t ready for and experienced a shift emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I generally put on weight, become lazy and have climate depression. With a new awareness, I am wanting to place my energy more positively during the Winter and enjoy every moment. I have accepted nothing will excel if I am negative and nothing will be accomplished with a closed mind. 

I am entering a progressive stage in my life and finally I am aware of my surroundings, the universal signals and temperature reactions. A few weeks ago my training’s education was our Auryvedic element, what essence we are in relation to in the world, times frames we thrive, seasons we respond well to and associations to avoid.  I was shocked to discover I am compatible to the Fall and Winter season and I am balanced with the calming cold.

As much of a scrooge I am to the shivering weather and Christmas spirit, I have secret spot in my heart for the theme of the season. Staying in with family, warming up on the couch and finding ease in the simple things. This season is all about comfort, act of giving and the ability to settle in your happiness. Finding joy with the significant others and sharing warm presence indoors. Being present with your presence and creating the fullest memories is the best gift you can give.

A passage to my journey

Standard

c69ca686dc620211f164b571b71a6f6f

This is my passage to progress and potential. My declaration to my dreams and true self. My ode to express my spirit and soul. My devotion to develop my mind and body.


One thing I’ve taken for granted is education and learning. I took time off of school and focused on working. As much as I love the freedom of no homework or tests, I longed for being taught and researching information. I started reading more, watching documentaries, writing creatively, creating projects and developing goals for myself. I gravitated towards the Law of Attraction in The Secret documentary and used the concepts to outline my philosophy and karma.

IMG_2640

I envisioned my future and formulated who I wanted to be. I was eager to illuminate my mind, enlighten my soul and emerge my body to reach it’s fullest potential.

I am on the path to chase my highest vision and deepest dreams. Taking classes, courses, projects, trainings etc which better myself. I am accepting the guidance and grasping the edification advantage. I want to direct my consciousness to my desired study and fuel my brain with every culture. Relating every action, experience, person, work as a learning opportunity, a chance to connect to another embrace or element.

IMG_2797

I choose not to chase after people, beliefs or activities which distract me or demote me. I will no longer focus on one aspect being more significant over another. Accepting every manifestation because the ideal aspects already exist around you and attract to you. Existences meant to be in your environment, will be. Whether for love, support, growth or fulfillment ….The right relations will either join your equation or link you to the next correspondence.

gu I am trying to become the fullest expression of myself. The ultimate outcome. I need to construct the optimal version of myself before I  can completely give myself or my fortune to another. I am not interested in sex or lust. I am interested in love and compassion. The joining of energies to form reactions and results. Accessing the association of equal kindness and mutual understanding between an embrace or element. Producing an environment of balance and establishment, within your universe and the external realm. I need to construct my own world and horizon before I can share it.

pianoI thirst for absorbing art, breathtaking nature, encountering philosophies, inspiring words, uplifting music and soul-escaping moments. I aspire to become the most innovative and reactive self, expressing my inner and outer abstractions.

Developing a magnet effect by establishing goals to achieve and destinations to discover. Devoting space and thought for self-evolution. I think down time should include reflecting, refueling, restoring and renewing the mind, body and soul. Finding the passageway to a clear consciousness and active awareness.

IMG_3144

Traveling and feeding the spirit with wisdom and experience. Every human encounter teaches us a lesson and contributes a piece to our puzzle. An emotion shared which brings you closer to your soul. Such instances enrich you to act out your message, passion and purpose. 

NAMASTE

Peace through broken pieces

Standard

“On the way to get away from where you are, you can run so fast that you miss the blessings along the way. By the time you realize that you have missed them, a major portion of your life has taken place without you.”-Iyanla Vanzant

67fca0c0b1c3144249e56b4ba4a5b06d

I have recently been struggling with inner issues dealing with past faults and pain. It’s a burden that overwhelms your spirit when it comes across love and happiness. Being broken is almost a liberating feeling, you have no place to go but up. You are in no rush to get the cracks filled, you let life fill them for you. With being broken comes the past paranoia which brought the hurt, when you come to similar issues, you cant help but convince yourself that the circumstances will be the same.

I met two people when I was broken, both of which became my best friends. I knew there was something special about them and wanted to take more interest in them. We both instantly clicked, one became my female best friend and the other was a male I started to see.  They would give me their attention, share their life, enjoy time with me and were willing to show me how beautiful I was. I couldn’t bring myself to the realization that someone thought so highly of me, someone thought so highly of our relationship. They wanted to be apart of my everyday, my joy, my laughter and my time. I created scenarios in my mind to slowly push them out and to sink in my loneliness. I would rather be alone than risk the potential of becoming hurt and losing these people.

I had a connection to them, I could feel their pain, I could feel their happiness, I could feel their struggles, I could feel their heart and I could feel their soul. Something would come over me when we would engaged in a deep conversations. My spirit shifted to the top layer of my skin, and released my inner knowing and answers to their life. I learned so much about myself through them, I saw myself in them and we were weak and strong together. I couldn’t accept the fact that we were a reflection of one another, that they were just like me, broken, irritated and irrational. I wasn’t there yet to give them love or become the love they needed. I felt as if they were overwhelming me, suffocating me, I became numb and was no longer fully presence.

They were both a big role in my motivation to spiritual wellness and healing. My girl friend and I would go to meditations, practice restorative yoga, have spiritual talks, encouraging talks and would bring each other up. My boy friend would remind me how beautiful and amazing I was, encourage me to take care of my body, to be positive, to challenge my mind, body and soul and encouraged my fitness in yoga.  When complementary energy is taken from your soul, you feel hopeless and lose your sense of self. I am a firm believer in self-healing and discovery but I know it takes a community of soul mates to bring you up along the way.

” And it was during this time that spirit and I became all but strangers. On most days, I lost track of my spiritual practices and my faith. I prayed and I meditated, but I was no longer sure what I believed or how I felt about what I believed. The thing that saved me and my faith alive was when I sat to write, stood before an audience to speak, or coached another person, I could feel the living presence of Spirit in my being.” -Iyanla Vanzant

I tried to escape them, but I couldn’t. They were apart of my everyday life, apart of my outer happiness and internal healing. I grew very ill, uninvolved in outside life and wanted to be left alone. I wasn’t ready to open up to the monster I was, the pain i suffered to get to that point or the sickness in my heart. It was crowding my mind and I needed out. I needed to come clean of the past, come clean of who I was and come clean of the wounds.

I started to pray to God, ask for healing and forgiveness. I needed to make things right with them and find the sanity to set me free. I took some on Saturday to finish up an old book regarding healing. Quotes would jump out at me, phrases would bring shivers and I felt this weight release from me. I went inside to validate and reassure my healing. I did a yoga routine and slowly eased into savasana. I begin to meditate, I heard the answers, I felt the intentions for these two souls and I knew my purpose in my life. My eyes began to shed cold, comforting tears to signify the release of the past and sickness in my heart. I came back outside and wrote my girlfriend a heart-felt letter and reached out to her. It was a lot harder to open up and ask for forgiveness from her rather than my past boyfriend, I finally opened up to him on the monster I was and the monsters I endured. It brought us closer and connected us deeper.

There is a part of us in everyone, there is a sickness or strain in everyone’s heart, no one wants to be evil or without love. Everyone is broken, everyone endures different type of pain, it is up to us to help break past those walls and find their shinning soul. You grow as person when you help someone you love grow, you heal as a person when you are apart of someones healing. Never give up on someone who would never give up on you, it is so much easier to quit and run away. Struggles provide strength, tears shed us of the elements which hold us back and love will always set you free.

NAMASTE.

The sun kisses the trees

Standard

20140516-162358.jpg

I love my life too much to waste my energy and time “hating” someone or something so purely.
Life is too precious to devote such negativity. Living free, worrying less and opening environments. No one is an enemy, objects pass if not favored. Never an obstacle or battle.

Flow from a centered mind. Relaxed movements, guiding you to fate. Feelings of ease provides insight. Pushing through the body,actions from inside. Stimulating the mind to breeze on by. Never forcing anything that doesn’t feel right, taking chances on what feels natural and most meaningful. Finding yourself by you’re strengths and weaknesses.

Channeling in on what makes your best self and not by the judgements of others. Agree to disagree, never a closed statement. Bridges never burnt, relations always settled. Learning through memories, struggles and sorrows.

20140516-162631.jpg

Everything is an experience, educated through actions and mistakes. Constructive criticism only, programmed to smile and be strong in every situation.

Always expanding the mind, body and soul. Mindfulness always present. Understanding yourself to understand others. Respect for yourself, humbled achievements, blessed from success and gratefulness of life’s reward.

An appreciation of life, love only giving and souls consuming. Forever grasping the meanings of who we are and why we are here.

 

NAMASTE

Clarence’s clarity

Standard

 

savasana

 

What setting allows us to sink into our own happiness? What barriers do we break through for our clarity? Sometimes you endure a problem to realize you can’t stay sane. Sometimes you need time to pause and recharge. Surrendering in Savasana (corpse pose or laying down) to find your peace of mind.


 

This past Friday at work, my boss and I were alerted that a co-worker had a seizure and isn’t breathing. We rushed into the warehouse to a dear friend, Clarance on the ground, non responsive. His body laid limp and lifeless as we surrounded him with blank stares. The situation was almost eerie, he looks so serene while medics are pumping and contracting his chest. He was at peace, floating to heavens gate. There’s was nothing the medics or employees could do to revitalize his body.

 

Clarence’s death was a hard concept to grasp. So sudden and silent. The sweet man who graced me with his presence and stories was gone. He would come back to the shop just to say hi, tell us about his bowling tournament or mishap his dog got into. His eyes would perk up every time he would be asked on those topics, he wouldn’t stop smiling either. He found joy in the little things and always went out of his way to share his happiness with us.

His last moments and our previous conversation controlled my mind until I had enough, and decided to leave work early.

On my drive home from work I saw a man laying outside a building in the grass. His eyes were softly shut and his smile was wide. What was this strange man doing? Why is he strange? Why is no one telling him to move or seeing if he is okay? Why am I judging him for taking time out of his day? What caused his rest in the sun and life? Why couldn’t I be comfortable with being myself and embracing the outdoors. I was so envious it brought judgement…

 

 

"At the root of all our fears lies the fear of death. How would our lives feel different if we died before we die? The power of Savasana, or corpse pose, lies in its ability to teach us how to surrender at the deepest levels. We will align our bodies in Savasana in ways that encourage the deepest relaxation at every level of our being. Partner Yoga poses, Thai Massage and other embodiment practices will empower us to go beyond fear and resistance to rest in the eternal aspects of our being. By exploring our relationship with death in a safe and sacred context, we will be empowered to live our lives more fully and openly."

“At the root of all our fears lies the fear of death. How would our lives feel different if we died before we die? The power of Savasana, or corpse pose, lies in its ability to teach us how to surrender at the deepest levels. We will align our bodies in Savasana in ways that encourage the deepest relaxation at every level of our being. Partner Yoga poses, Thai Massage and other embodiment practices will empower us to go beyond fear and resistance to rest in the eternal aspects of our being. By exploring our relationship with death in a safe and sacred context, we will be empowered to live our lives more fully and openly.”

 

When we lay down we are at ease, we are deciding to soften to the comfort of our frame. Whether we are in a hospital bed, lovers bed, family’s bed or a bed of flowers… There is something significance to this position and I wanted to further explore it.

I was so confused why God took such a simplistic and special person so early. How just the day before he was talking my ear off about him and his wife’s wedding anniversary party. It was so precious to see his excitement to celebrate with loved ones and anticipation of the life event shared with his wife. It made me so sad to realize, I will never get the opportunity to chat with him or participate in his joy’s of life.

I wanted to escape, not think or be upset anymore. I took my dog and went for a walk around the golf course. I found a nice patch of grass, sprawled out in savasana and shut my eyes to the world.

 

20131221-024923.jpg

 

I thought of the little things that contributed to my tranquil landscape. How escaping my mind meant taking in Nature and letting Nature’s essence calm me.

There’s beauty in escaping to an open field and experiencing God’s surroundings. There is something so satisfying about resting your body on top of the soft grass, feeling the breeze brush you and the sun light kissing your face. Knowing that in this moment there is no hurt, hate, negativity or pressure to break your mindfulness.

I looked to the sky’s bright clouds and saw the suns rays sparkling through. Almost as if my inner and outer light was reaching me, letting me know there is hope.  I found clarity in knowing he’s in Heaven and God wanted him early for a reason. I was thankful for his presence in my life, my escaping tranquility of life and my time on Earth.


 

This post is dedicated to Clarence.

I will no longer mourn his death, but appreciate the lessons learned and energy absorbed.

I will give more time for savasana, adoring nature, playing with my dog, participating in my passions and sharing the joys in my life.

 

REST IN PEACE. 

NAMASTE. 

Believe in Hope and Achieve Universal Peace.

Standard

Image

Recent celebrations of faith, rebirth and passover has created an endless feeling of being blessed in my heart. I am so thankful for every day, light and experience in my life-which makes me..me and develops my life.

*One of my favorite times of the year*

The transition of Spring to Summer 

The warming weather has me energetic. Spring’s essence is fluttering my writing bloom. The Sun’s shine is inspiring my inner light.

I have been writing a lot and will  be sharing a piece every week of what “I Believe” and what evokes my mind, body and soul.

Image

I believe we endure heartbreak and tragedy to grow and become stronger.

I believe I’ve vacationed darkness multiple times, but always traveled to light to guide me through.

I believe I pray, meditate and practice yoga to strengthen my soul.

I believe I have been praying for the right path and for forgiveness.

I believe I am created and inspired for a specific reason.

I believe I am the light, God chooses to move and speak through me in dire times.

I believe we are here to teach, inspire and learn from others as well as ourselves.

I believe I am given signs from a higher power and the universe to better myself and this planet.

I believe I write with meaning, honesty and pureness of the soul.

I believe I have a reason, message and story to tell.

Namaste!

To be Love

Standard
Image

Valentine’s Day is a Holiday which celebrates relationships in your life, selects those who have your heart and appreciates the ones you love. The day is filled with romance and gifts with a significant other(s).

What is it to Love? What does it take to Love or be in Love? Why is every heartache, melody, happiness, mystery or madness stem from Love? Why are we in such a search and struggle to find Love? 

To Love someone is to love yourself, To Love a trait in another is to love the traits you have within, To Love in full and so purely, we love ourselves and others… flaws and all. 

When we are born, we are born from the act of love. We are welcomed with eager eyes and warm hearts waiting to shower us in Love. Family members show love by protecting, nurturing, caring and providing for this new life. We are taught love from our surroundings, sharing, touching, communicating and contributing. How we love and how give love is grasped at a young age. We spend our whole lives circulating around the idea of Love, figuring it out and inquiring varied types. 

Love is rooted from inner peace, inner joy and inner satisfaction. 

Why not give back to the person you have to live with everyday, required to spend time with, the one who moves and motivates you…. YOURSELF. 

Loving one self is to appreciate, listen and provide for the mind, body and spirit. Taking time to nourish the body with vitamins, moisture, water and essentials to feel replenished. Taking time to engage the mind, with yoga, meditation or a book to restore oneself. Taking time to surrender the spirit with a walk, bath, nap or detox to refresh your energy. 

This past week for me has been so hectic, I haven’t found enough time for myself or taken time to relax. I have been in constant movement, preparing for Spring break and the future. I lost track of the time I was in, not realizing who I was living for or who I was accomplishing these tasks for. I was pilling events in the free space of my day to make up for lost time. Going to more yoga classes, tanning back to back, eating a lot for missed meals and staying up later to catch up. Every experience was accompanying my obligations and misplaced moments. 

My body caught up to me and responded by being burnt on the outside and drained on the inside. I took the first part of the week to take a bath, hydrate my body and calm my mind.  I downloaded a meditation music app and actually took a peaceful nap. Meditation and Yoga became more sacred and serene.I channeled in on my center and focused on my body messages. I put my phone away, turned on some music and became wholesome again. Melodies flowed through me, choruses whispered through my ears and slowly fulfilled my inner silence. 

 

Image Image Image

 

 

 

Our time lessens when we in a rush to the future, our quality weakens to the detachment of the current moment. What is it to live for yourself and give back to yourself? 

I learned a beautiful lesson this week of, learning to love and appreciate yourself. I listened to my body when It told me to slow down and rest. I gave back to this amazing mold by taking care of myself, calmed my machine by resting and revisiting silence.  I re-energized my mind, body and spirit by participating in the present and savoring the time with myself. 

 

Today’s Valentines blog is dedicated to the Love within yourself and relationship you hold with your mind, body and spirit. 

Namaste